Busy, Busy, Busy - 2017/01/26

Apparently, I have undone in three days more than Obama did in eight years. Pretty impressive

Anyways, my plans to shut down government bodies informing the public; reduce regulations by 75%; anger environmentalists by resurrecting the Keystone pipeline; stir up our neighbours to the south by starting the wall; cutting company taxes; stomping down on funding for abortion/safe areas; and banning moslems from entering the country etc. all on the quiet, didn’t work out.

The first part - the diversionary tactic worked a treat. I got my Press Secretary to spice up the numbers who watched my inauguration. Here is an extract from day 2 of this kerfuffle

And my homily on the rain that wasn’t (#alternativeFact™)

Of course the slow-witted lefties picked up on these porkies and brought in crowd scientists, whatever they are. (cloud scientists with a lisp. Ed.), to dispute the White House figures and almighty bickering pursued.
My favorite loony-left paper, The Guardian are still pursuing it. You would think that me claiming that the vote was rigged even though I won was an obvious laugh at their expense but, no, the po-faced scribblers are treating it serously!

I mean who the fuck really cares about numbers or a bit of rain!

But, I just couldn’t follow through by signing all these presidential orders whilst sitting on the john.
Apparently the MSM that so despises me still needs my pictures and videos as click-bait for their failing enterprises. Otherwise they would have to bore readers with stories about how Obama is setting up some scam with a charity as its front and hell would freeze over before that happens

So there were loads of chants from NYT and Washington Post hacks of “We want Trump, We want Trump” and I relented. I know. I’m a big softy at heart